Tuesday, September 16, 2008

And SO it begins...

The self doubt and paranoia has come up in full force over the last 3 hours.

Holy crap. I have to run a marathon. It's not longer "YAY, I get to run a marathon," It's "I have to run for some ridiculous amount of time that people don't like to even drive and I'm going to do so with a smile on my face after having trained only 36km."

HOLY CRAP!!!!!!

And I know it's still 11 more sleeps until I'm running this thing, but the non-logical part of me is thinking that this is going to give me more time to prepare. I can go out and run 42km, and then I know I'm ready.

But alas, the logical part of me is saying--too close of a time for injuring my poor, (slightly less)exhausted body already.

What does my body have to say about all this?

Why are you not taking me out for a 3hr run today??? What am I going to do with all this extra, pent up energy, hm? I know you took me out for an hour run Yesterday and that you're going to make me work and go to school today but I NEED to run!

And so I take my body out for a short (20 minute) run. During this 20 minutes, everythinnggg hurts. I'll put them in list form for your easy reading pleasure (and we'll do it logically too-we can start at the bottom and work our way up:

  1. Heels of my feet and balls of my feet: Plantar Facitiis? My mom had that for awhile. Maybe it runs in the family. Freezing juice can to roll on the bottom of my feet when I get home.
  2. Arches: Feel like they're falling. Is it my orthodics? Could they be worn out already? I got them in March. What about my shoes? Could that be the problem? Is the cushioning gone?
  3. Ankles: Maybe the orthodics aren't correctioning my problems and I'm still rolling over on my ankles. OR maybe they're correcting it too much and it's making it worse? What if????Maybe this taper is causing me to gain weight and it's too much for my ankles to handle and they're going to give out on me (note: This is not (yet?) the reason due to the fact that when I stepped on the scale my weight is consistant...but it could be)
  4. Achilles Tendon: It's tight. Both of them. It might be because of the oncoming plantar facitis and tight calves.
  5. Calves: Are cramping when I'm just sitting around doing nothing. Maybe I'm not hydrated well enough. Maybe I have a salt imbalance. Maybe it's something to do with potassium.Maybe that Beardsley guy that Nitmos talks about is going to follow me around before the marathon.
  6. Knees: Both of them. My bad knee hurts around the ACL and my other (better) knee hurts where it meets my IT Band. Did I re-tear my ACL? Maybe theres scar tissue on my ITBand. Must roll out with 'The Stick' when I return to my home

My quads, hips, hams and core are fine (thankfully) but then you get to:

6. My Lungs and Throat: My lungs are aching and my throat is killing me. Now, this one may not be in my head because taper is the best time to get sick (well not the best time but a likely time) and everyone at work and school is sick and my mother (like always) is sick again. I have a plan of action for this one as well...I'm going to get vitamin C tonight as soon as I am done work, and I am going to carry it around and give it to everyone close to me so that they don't get sick (thus giving me no possible way of getting sick. Brilliant, right?)

I will post the other thing that is plaguing my thoughts as well, and then hopefully forget about it until tomorrow:

The goal for the race is to finish with nothing at all left. Just completely depleated (and elated). But the question then is: HOW? I know, I work hard for a long time, but what if I work hard too early and then run out of energy and then not finish? Or what if I start to late and could've done better or what if, what if, what if?!?!

How do I make the "What if's" go away??

AFAFVIABAHUDAGFHASDF

YEAH.

I'll figure it out and let you know.

8 Comments:

At 12:20 PM , Blogger Marlene said...

Have you read this article?

http://www.runnersworld.com/article/0,7120,s6-238-244--10201-1-1X2X3X4-5,00.html

What about this you?

http://www.runnersworld.com/article/0,7120,s6-238-244--5958-1-1X2X3X4X5-6,00.html

Both have been great for distraction (and information) during my taper so far.

I, too, feel like everything hurts. WTF?!

WRT to leaving it all on the course and finishing with nothing left, I've been thinking about the same thing. My "tentative plan" is to take it slow-ish for the first half, at a pace that I'm pretty confident I could keep up for the full distance (although, not sure what this is yet?) and HOPEFULY take it up a notch if I feel that I can. I'm kinda just hoping I'll know around the half-way point if I can afford to push harder. KWIM?

 
At 2:51 PM , Blogger Jess said...

Try not to focus on the what ifs. Just focus on the vision of crossing that finish line.

 
At 5:45 PM , Blogger yumke said...

Sounds like taper madness to me. I've started to check the long range forecast every few hours, somehow expecting a change of weather.

Hang in there. Your body is healing up, resting up and then it's ready to give you all you need on the 28th.

 
At 6:56 PM , Blogger Wes said...

Yea, everything hurts before the marathon and every little part of the mind worries. Knock it off. Not that you will, mind you. We all know better. You are ready. You will be fine. You will kick some ass...

 
At 1:18 PM , Blogger Viper said...

I'm glad I'm not alone in the mid-taper, pre-race freak-out. Cheers.

 
At 5:34 PM , Blogger Steve Stenzel said...

Be calm. You've done what you can. Get ready to ROCK IT!!

 
At 7:55 AM , Blogger Tanya said...

You can do this. You've trained really well. Think about how you're going to feel after the race, how proud you'll be for completing a marathon. When the doubts come, just think about crossing the finish line. Hang in there, you're so close!

 
At 12:28 PM , Blogger Vickie said...

All this is normal on a first time event. You've got the usual pre-race jitters and taperitis going on. Trust yourself! You can do this. Don't worry about finishing time, just think about the start and finishing.

 

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