Tuesday, September 29, 2009

Mediocrity

Ok friends.
I know it's been awhile. Infact, I'm not even sure if i posted after I went to Lake Placid and didn't sign up for Ironman. If I didn't...well then I owe you another post. This post I present you with today really doesn't have much to do with running. Or maybe nothing at all. But it's important to me to share it with you and since you guys are my blog family, and will still love me even when i don't post as much as I should, you can deal with it.

Things have been really hard for me. I decided not to go back to school. I'm working full-time. I'm not running. I'm making changes and doing things that are really hard but are going to affect my life for the better, and even though it really sucks I'm still doing them.

But I think I get stuck there. I get stuck in this place where nothing else really matters. I wake up, and I go to work. And I love my job. I mean, I love, love, love my job. I work with the best people and can go in on the verge of tears and I leave smiling and ok. But I want to grow and learn and when I am not fully present it's really really difficult.

Running for me is just more time to think, and that is really the last thing that I need. And it's frustrating. Because I love it. And I know I do. But it just doesn't make me feel as good because I'm so distracted. There are some pretty crazy, difficult, life changing things going on in my life right now and I'm stuck there.

So, here I am. I am committing myself to greatness. I will not let myself get stuck in my head. In the places that it doesn't do me any good. I know it's not going to be easy, but I am destined to do amazing things. The things that bother me now and keep me stuck will no longer dictate my life. I will run, and I will enjoy it. I will inspire people.

Who I am being is courgaeous, and the possibility that I am creating is the possibility of freedom, happiness and greatness.

Thanks for reading.

Perhaps a running related post for you soon?

4 Comments:

At 3:14 AM , Blogger Wes said...

chase your dreams Tigrrr... especially while you are young and full of life...

 
At 6:09 AM , Blogger Lisa Slow-n-Steady said...

Best wishes getting unstuck.

 
At 6:19 AM , Blogger lindsay said...

well the good news is you love your job! hopefully you can "unstick" yourself in the other areas you are less-than-thrilled with and find a good, happy balance.

i'm jealous that you enjoy your work. i need to make a more proactive effort to find something i will enjoy too instead of settling ...

 
At 8:13 AM , Blogger Marlene said...

Emily, can I just say THANK YOU SO MUCH for coming out on Sunday. Seeing you totally gave me a big boost for the finish. Sorry about the sweaty hug! I was so excited to see you, if you couldn't tell. :)

Sorry about the tough time you've been having. Sounds like some not so good things going on. You're a truly awesome person and I really wish you the best and all the strength and support you need!

 

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